Die vom anderen Stern

Mir wird immer mal wieder schmerzhaft bewusst, dass ich seitdem ich Mutter bin zu einer Außerirdischen mutiert bin. Nein Moment, eigentlich ist es anders – diejenigen, die keine Kinder haben, leben auf einem anderen Stern, sie haben keine Chance in unsere Galaxie einzutreten, selbst wenn sie es wollen würden. Kein Verständnis für etwas zu haben was man selbst (noch) nicht erlebt hat ist die eine Sache, aber bei purer Ahnungslosigkeit lohnt es sich hin und wieder doch einfach mal den Mund geschlossen zu halten. Ein Beispiel, über das ich immer wieder schrecklich schmunzeln und dabei unaufhörlich den Kopf schütteln muss: Zehn Tage nach der Geburt meines Sohnes fragte mich eine bekannte allen Ernstes, ob ich mich jetzt eigentlich zu Hause langweilen würde, weil Babys doch eh noch so viel schlafen…

LANGWEILEN!? Ich wiederhole, sie fragte mich das !!!10 Tage!!! nach der Geburt meines 1. Kindes! Jede Mutter wird an dieser Stelle den Kopf schütteln, denn wir wissen: So kurz nach einer Entbindung ist dein Körper auf Hochtouren damit beschäftigt neue Hormone und literweise Milch zu produzieren, zusätzlich den Schlafmangel zu kompensieren, sich von einem enormen Geburts-Wehen & Press-Marathon oder einer Operation zu erholen, zusätzlich die Geburtsverletzungen zu heilen, restliches Blut auszuscheiden und und und… Und damit wären wir NUR mit den körperlichen Dingen durch. Hinzu kommt die enorme Umstellung des Alltags, die absolute Selbstaufgabe für dieses hilflose Wesen, obwohl Körper, Seele & Geist es absolut verdient hätten uneingeschränkte Aufmerksamkeit zu bekommen. Das so einschneidende und unvergleichliche Erlebnis einer Geburt ist nicht von heute auf morgen verarbeitet, es macht etwas mit uns, es verändert uns, lässt uns spüren zu welch enormen Dingen unser Körper fähig ist, bringt uns zur Verzweiflung, weil nie alles so funktioniert wie wir es uns wünschen würden, Ängste, Sorgen, Unsicherheiten… und macht uns zu einem neuen Menschen – zu einer Mutter…

Das Erlebnis einer Geburt und des Wochenbetts ist etwas so zauberhaft, zerbrechliches und wundervoll-verletzliches zugleich, dass es sich mit Worten nie ausreichend beschreiben oder gar erklären lässt, aber eins ist es sicherlich nicht – LANGWEILIG!

Eine weitere Situation, die mich ebenfalls in der Woche nach der Geburt wirklich verletzte kam von einer meiner besten Freundinnen (die es absolut nicht böse meinte, das weiß ich!). Sie fragte, ob sie nicht mal wenigsten 5 Minuten vorbeikommen könnte um das Baby anzugucken. Als ich ihr daraufhin schrieb, dass die Tage verfliegen und wir leider wegen Verdacht auf Gelbsucht noch ein paar Mal in die Kinderklink fahren müssen, die U2 beim Kinderarzt ansteht und und und, antwortete sie nur: „Oh wow, dein Terminkalender ist ja voller als vorher…“ Aber nein, es geht hier um viel mehr als einen vollen Terminkalender, der sich übrigens in dieser Zeit mit nur einem Termin in zwei Tagen zu voll anfühlt…

Zu guter letzt eine andere mir sehr liebe Person, die zu mir und einer anderen Mutter kürzlich sagte, dass sie mit ihren Kindern kein so langes Theater rund um’s einschlafen machen würde. Sie würde ihnen einfach ein Hörspiel anmachen, das funktioniere bei ihr ja auch immer super zum runterkommen und einschlafen. „Ähm, ja…!“ Dachten wir uns.

Geht ihr anderen erst mal ein paar Schritte in den Schuhen einer Mutter, und ich meine nicht nur bis zur nächsten Ecke mit Sonnenschein… Geht doch noch ein bisschen weiter, in einen Tag hinein an dem das Kind mitten in einem Entwicklungsschub keine Sekunde den Körperkontakt zu dir verlieren möchte, geht weiter hinein in eine Nacht, in der das Kind fiebert, zahnt und bläht (da wird so ein Hörspiel den Säugling ganz sicherlich schnell und sanft in den Schlaf begleiten, während du entspannt ein Vollbad nehmen und dir die Nägel lackieren kannst) und geht weiter in den darauffolgenden Tag an dem du vor lauter Müdigkeit und Knochenschmerzen nicht mehr weißt wo oben und unten ist, dich aber dennoch um dein Kind kümmerst weil das krankschreiben und einfach im Bett bleiben bei Mamas eben noch nicht erfunden wurde…

Wisst ihr, wir alle sollten nicht über andere urteilen oder ihr Verhalten in Frage stellen, so lange wir nicht ein paar mehr Meter in den Schuhen der anderen gelaufen sind. Es ist oft schwer, aber das sollten wir alle lernen…

118 Antworten auf „Die vom anderen Stern“

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